Maybe I still got more to learn about this tragedy. Maybe I should be honest about my feelings: I’ve got things to face, and it’s okay to take one step at a time. I need to understand myself, more to heal, more to learn, and more to accept. I’m not what I was a year ago. There is time that when I remember about the past and my chest no longer aches.
I’m better now. There are feelings that no longer make me unable to function. There are triggers that no longer make me freeze. I see myself stronger, no memories that hurt me, and I’m starting to forget the people that used to be important for me.
People said it’s easier to forgive than to forget. One is to give yourself peace while the others constantly make others completely disappeared in our life. Sometimes people think to forgive is to forgetting certain feelings. Forgetting that someone hurt you, forgetting the pain that they caused and going on in life as though it didn’t happen, often with that person still in your life.
Sometimes you can’t do what you love anymore, because of what they did on purpose. Sometimes they don’t even regret it. And all you can do is be better for yourself. Even if it cost you your sanity, your time, and everything that important to you.
You must accept that somethings are better left unsaid. Sometimes it’s worthless for you to forgive, it will not decrease your wounds, the pain they caused will not go away. Forgiving the person who hurt you is the gift you give to others, while moving on is a gift to yourself.
I have survived my pain, my break up. I have come so far and sometimes I forget how great this feeling is. It’s easy to lose sight of that when my eyes still linger on you. But I let it hit me, let it sink in here for a moment. I remember where I am now and how much things have gone in time.
There are emotions that I no longer afraid to remember, words that I can spell about you, stories about us that I can tell without shaking. I have faced my own demon. I already take the road, step by step. I’m proud of myself. Of what I’ve become and how far I made this progress.
I still remember you, it hurts sometimes, but now I have love that completes me. The kind of love that accept me, my trauma, my past, and never mock it. I hope for your happiness. But I also hope that we will never meet again.
